Griping

I think all in all, today was a fairly productive day.

1. Finished and e-filed my taxes, both federal and state, for the most part, free.
2. Finished a quiz on a few topics discussed this week in my Ob-Gyn rotation. Did well.
3. Payed a few medical bills. Not too bad.
4. Finished and filed my 2010-2011 FAFSA (financial aid) form. Hopefully I get my refund check very soon.
5. Printed out next week's Ob-Gyn articles (in the plural sense - like 7 of them). So far, only read a fraction of one.

So why the suggestive title on this blog?
Well, I'm kinda pissed. I'm pissed at people talking about me behind my back.
Case in point: this neighbor of ours who came by today. I'm doing items 1-5 listed above while he chatted up my brother-in-law (BIL) who was installing the new sliding doors for the porch. So this guy was all praise and fluff about how my BIL put up the new doors (which BIL did - it was a damn good job). So neighbor starts talking about how he thought BIL couldn't do it all by himself, that he would've come had BIL asked for help. Well, BIL already asked my dad for help, but called him off @ noon because I was able to give a hand a little bit (didn't tear up the wall, but did help remove the old window, helped hoist and level the new doors, and removed old nails/scrap wood cleanup, all after picking up BIL's son from a school retreat an hour away). So why so pissed, you ask? Well, said neighbor just happen to inquire if I helped or rather, I should say insinuated that I didn't help in this whole project. Mind you, I'm sitting by the counter clearly listening to all of this crap going on.
K, let's put things straight here:
1. I don't like manual labor. Never have. And let's face it, who does? That doesn't mean I'm afraid to get my hands dirty, far from it. I've done a good deal of manual labor in my day. So I'm no stranger to work.
2. If somebody asks for my help or a favor from me, if I can do it, I do it, to the best of my abilities.
3. I'm not a mind reader. I don't care what anybody says about taking initiative. As far as I'm concerned, initiative comes from experience, which means having prior knowledge of the task at hand. If I don't know the task, then I hang back and wait for orders.

So...
Firstly, I didn't know BIL was installing the new doors this weekend (I was actually passed out yesterday and was not given any prior notice nor was asked to help in the project).
Secondly, I was given a task this morning to pick up BIL's son, which I did, and even bought donuts since I saw that the project was started this morning, and that everybody would be working hard.
Thirdly, Who the fuck does this neighbor think he is, criticizing me? Why would he talk shit about me especially in front of BIL, unless BIL has already talked shit about me in front of neighbor, giving him precedence?
Fourthly, I had hoped that if BIL had any problems about me, that he'd come to me and talk to me about it so I can address it.
Fifthly, I don't know how to emphasize this enough: Given my current state, I may not look busy, but trust me, being in med school is the definition of busy. And it takes a lot out of you, both mentally and physically. You wake up at 6am to follow doctors and patients, you do all this sucking up and other extraneous crap so you can get a good rec letter/secure a spot for next year, and in the evening, do some more studying, not just for the current subject, but also prepare for boards, usually until midnight or so, all so you don't end up looking foolish if some doctor were to pimp you on some random medical question the next day. Oh, don't forget the ever looming pressure of having somebody's life in your hands plus the 200K+ student debt that you've acquired in the past 4 years. So forgive me, if once in a while I decide to crash.
I wish I could take this Neighbor of ours and stick him in our med school shoes, just so he'd know the shit we have to go through. He can't fault us for not having tried their menial jobs; most of us had them before we started med school.

Bottom line:
1. If you want my help, then ask. I'm not a mind reader.
2. Don't talk shit about me behind my back. If you got a problem about me, let me know.

Song of the day: "Shout" - Disturbed (Tears For Fears cover)