Ermmm...sorry.

For being away so long, I apologize.

I have been sick. For about a month.

At first I thought I was having a bad allergic reaction to something I don't know.

Then the hives got worse and then I thought "bedbugs." I know, gross.

I became quite paranoid and pretty much vacuumed and cleaned and recleaned and re-recleaned everything I had.

But the damn hives didn't get any better...that is until I was put on steroids.
Apparently it was an allergic reaction to either a viral or a bacterial infection that I had recently.

Well, so far, the itchiness and hives have gone away for the most part. Lets hope they stay away for good once I finish the steroid regimen.

On another note, I went to a friend's wedding and managed a slow dance with one of her friends towards the end of the reception. Then I asked for her number (my friend's friend). Then she gave it to me. Problem is, she lives in Connecticut and getting in touch with her is a bit dodgy. I called her a week ago, she called me today, I texted back. I'll call her again tomorrow to see if I can make a date happen.

So my Massachusetts rotation is all finished. It was a very mixed outcome at the end of it all. I had an Honors and Pass grade...I guess I wasn't as good in my last rotation as I thought I was. On the upside, I did learn a lot, and I enjoyed myself there for the most part. Now if only they'd send me an invite for an interview.

Speaking of which, I have 11 residency interviews to date. The first one, being done this past week. Not much to go on. Lots of vague questions, and plenty of me, being absolutely nervous and possibly babbling the whole time. That and I was fighting the fatigue from the night before, not being able to sleep properly because I was so nervous. I hope the next interview will be better.

So, that is my update. More to come soon, I'm sure.

Song of the day: "Intro" -> "Crystalized" - The XX (Live)

Interview

For the curious...in reference to my last post.

1. Author: Paulo Coelho - "The Alchemist." Musician: Jeff Buckley - "Lover, You Should've Come Over."

2. Lock Picking. I think that would be a really cool skill to own ::sly grin::

3. Two sugars. I used to take it black, but I needed to cut the bitter with a little sweet. Kinda like life.

4. The Heimlich, proper CPR, how to use chopsticks, knitting, how to skip stones, changing a tire, opening a beer bottle with a lighter...

5. Marlon Brando, the younger version of him. Just check out his delivery of this Shakespeare monologue and you'll know why he's in my head.

6.  Yes, I do believe in destiny, but more importantly, I believe that the path we take and not our destination is what makes our life in this earth, special.

7. I think I was a grizzly bear, hunting wild salmon in the rivers of the great northwest United States in a former life.

8. Formaldehyde, more specifically, the smell of our anatomy lab.  No matter how many layers of gloves you wear, it still gets to your fingernails, hair, scrubs...just gross.  On the flip side, firewood burning during a crisp winter evening...there's nothing like it.

9. Ploosh (n.) - state of confusion or disorientation specifically caused by an overload of information, followed by difficult questioning.  Ex. Medical students rarely raise their hands after nephrology lecture because they are in ploosh.
 
10. 12:34am...I'm either super tired or extremely energetic.

11. CYRANO DE BERGERAC - technically, he did exist in real life, but the character in Rostand's play is much more interesting.  Poet, musician, philosopher, soldier, duelist, physicist, comedian, and true blue romantic.  He certainly tried to accomplish what he set out to do: excel in everything.

12. My inability to rein in my geekish sensibilities.

13. Never really had one.  I suppose I should start.  I would like to cross out this one in particular: travel ALL the States in the Union by eating my way through them or at least visiting all their famous national parks.

14. I'm currently writing my personal statement for my residency application.  EPIC FAIL.

15. Me, flying/hovering over white sand dunes.  Pretty much that's all there is to it.  It's fun tho, getting the sensation that I'm flying, especially if I'm having a vivid dream.

16. I answered this one before, but I do have others in mind: A Zebra F-301 pen is also a very good choice.  I like the weight of the pen and the thinness of the stroke.

17. Midnight picnic @ the beach a week before Memorial Day, when there were few people around.  A new moon was out, a bottle of red was at hand and bag full of fresh, sweet cherries was the main course.  We sat on the sand, dug in and buried our feet, and proceeded to have a cherry pit-spitting contest.  I fell in love that night.

18. See the answer to question 11.  Either him or Yoda.  I'd like to think that in some ways, I'm slowly figuring out how to be more like them...except for the using-the-force thingy.  That part, I can't seem to ever get the hang of.
 
19. "He loved and was loved in return."

20. My last meal...I really don't want a last meal but the whole course from breakfast to dinner and dessert.
Breakfast: 2 eggs over medium, kalo kalo (garlic fried rice), longanisa +/- daing (dried, salted fish) and strong coffee.
Lunch: White rice, Fried Tilapia with soy sauce (or almost any fish for this matter) and Apan-Apan.  Semi-ripe indian mangoes with sauteed shrimp paste as an appetizer.
Afternoon snack: Fruit (Lansones, Santol, Serguilas, mainly asian fruits).
Dinner: Grilled pork or a very large aged kobe beef steak, A1 steak sauce, sweet potato fries (or potato pancakes from the Nevada Diner) and a Sam Adams.
Dessert: rocky road ice cream over pecan pie (I can settle for vanilla).

What can I say? I'm a glutton.

Song of the day: "I Don't Know" - Lisa Hannigan

BTW, check the link I placed in Lisa Hannigan's name. It's the official video of this song and it is very cool.

And you are...

Now I'm no overachiever or some shining med student with a "save-the-world" complex that I fill my every waking (and sleeping) hours with numerous altruistic projects. Nor am I a complete slacker (tho some days, I absolutely feel like it and would gladly welcome a slacker lifestyle). I am your average medical student, just getting by, busily and "faithfully" placing my nose to the grindstone, cramming my head with medical minutiae, hoping that in the end, I would understand all of it, that I would be a competent physician and a credit to the medical community, that I was worth investing $180,000/4 years into.
That being said, I always feel so weird trying to get other people to say good things about me. Case in point, my number 1 task this week: collecting letters of recommendation. Some doctors I've asked were easy to approach, especially if I've just finished a rotation with them a few weeks ago. Others, not so much because it was earlier in the year and I didn't get to spend a whole lot of time with them. Now, why, you ask, am I asking these other doctors whom I barely got have face time with? Simple: They're good doctors, and I learned a lot from them. The only problem is that, they are so busy with many other students going through their service that it's difficult for them to keep everybody straight, let alone remember. You either have to suck majorly or be Doogie Howser, MD, or be some sort of Extreme example of something in order to stand out in their minds. Fortunately/Unfortunately I'm neither, hence my dilemma. I've put out requests for LOR, but I fear that some of these docs would write an average paper because they barely remember me. Still, I gotta try.
For now, I'll just go back to hitting the books hard and pray that the next time I'm on rotation, I'll be a much brighter student worthy of remembering. Or I could just get a mohawk, dye it agent orange, and call it a day.

Song of the day: "The Curse" - Josh Ritter


An extraordinary song to cheer up an ordinary med student.

weekEND

YAY!  Finished with surgery, at last!!!  Actually to tell the truth, it wasn't all that bad. Aside from all the attitude, I enjoyed it (ok this is starting to sound like my last blog).  So I think I've come to a temporary consensus...since I like both internal medicine and surgery, they will dictate my electives for this year and depending on how my electives pan, I will rank those 2 possibilities accordingly.

On another note, I really hoped that the weekend would have been responsibility-free for me, but unfortunately, it was not.  After I finished the surgery SHELF exam this past Friday, I was inundated by random phone calls from random people telling me that I should finish all sorts or random paperwork needed for all sorts of random happenings (I will be more specific when these "nebulous" random happenings begin to corporialize themselves - I hope that's a word...my spell-checker is telling me otherwise).  So I moseyed on down to the school library and along the way, passed by this girl in my surgery rotation who I have a wicked crush on.  Let me preface by saying that prior to bumping into her, I was chowing down (as is my custom) on a Nature Valley granola bar (the ones with the almonds and peanut butter - so good...).  After exchanging pleasantries and whatnot, we said our goodbyes, she headed back to the hospital, I to my cubicle in the dungeon. So I waved goodbye and in my usual way, finish with a cheery grin. I later find out to my horror, when I visited the bathroom, that a fairly sizable piece of almond skin had secured itself snugly on my front tooth, making me look like one of the inbred characters from Deliverance. "Nice..." I groaned.  Oh well.  Damage done.  Next. 

So after that whole debacle (yes, I removed the almond skin, thank you), I found an empty cubicle and proceeded to the task of busy work.  Then out of nowhere, a strange girl (strange as in "stranger" not strange = weird), said "Hello" to me.  I must admit, I was at a loss until she saw the blank expression on my face and pitied me.  Turned out she is a visiting student who was assigned to my Internal Medicine rotation back in January.  I didn't recognize her because she sat in the back of our mini-lectures and I never really got to talk to her.  Well, after this little encounter, she sure chatted me up some, like I was a long lost friend or something...even gave me a stiff, jovial smack on the shoulder for a random joke I let fly.  It stung like the Dickens, too.  She was nice, but was really up front/mildly aggressive about any topic in our conversation...she even tried to hook me up with her sister who lives in Virginia.  Really didn't know what to make out of it all.  One thing that didn't jive all to well with me, she was wearing a navy blue peacoat, almost the same as the one that the last Ex wore.  But, flashbacks and PTSD aside, I got over it fast and spent the next half hour of our encounter reviewing pediatric Boards questions with her.  The whole situation was weirdly nice.  Then she left to go to a surgery convention happening at our school that same day.  She's cute, but still not my type.

That evening, I told my brother-in-law about the encounter.  He asked if I got her number.  I said no. Then he proceeded to ask me if I was gay (no offense). Again, I said no.  Then he said, "You don't have to always date the perfect chick or a white chick all the time, you know. Just go out and have fun with a girl."
I didn't know how to respond to that one.

Now, I'm an equal-opportunity guy.  It doesn't matter to me what ethnic background you are - if I like you, then I like you.  However, I am known to be very picky about the girls I date (I find it a hell of a lot easier to commiserate with someone who has similar tastes as I do - which, is both a good and a bad thing, especially if you're single).  And unfortunately, there haven't been many Asian (single) women in my previous dating pools, hence the whole thing about dating white women.  And the ones that I developed an eye for have been way too uptight or were/are engaged/married.  And for some reason, they all just can't get past the geek side of me.  I've toned it down some, but I'll be damned if I have to change myself for that nonsense.

And so we come to my present state.  Soon to be 30, single, and in a whole lot of debt.  I disagree with my Bro-in-law about just going out willy-nilly with some woman, because I tried that once and it turned out to be a complete waste of my time and energy, and of course it's not fair to me or to the girl. So I learned from that point on that: I can't compromise (too much) about the aesthetic/idiosyncratic parameters I would like my woman to have; flings and one-night-stands is not what I'm about; I want a relationship based on friendship, passion, and a keen interest for each other; I don't care what color you are, so long as you dig me and I dig you.

Bottom line - I don't want perfect, just the one who's perfect for me.

Song of the day: "Hey Julie" - Fountains of Wayne

Local movie theater does good

I did not expect my local movie cinema to actually have fresh-cut flowers by the sinks in the men's bathroom.
But they did.
And they looked nice.
And I thought it odd.
Weird for a cinema? Maybe. But it caught my attention, and their eye for this small detail gets them an A+ in my book.
That and they actually gave me a student discount on top of a matinee price.
Sweet.

Song of the day: "Naked As We Came" - Iron and Wine